2/14/26
I believe people can experience breakthroughs almost arbitrarily. e.g. “All of a sudden I just wasn’t afraid of flying any more.” I think this can bias people to think that being not afraid of flying is easy, just stop being afraid. I think that’s the wrong takeaway.
I think there’s a sort of alchemical soup we’re always living in. We don’t know what we’re thinking or why we’re feeling anything really. All that soup is the important bit.
The bit you can see where you all of a sudden aren’t afraid of flying any more is the “easy” (its not always easy, finally taking the plunge can be terrifying) part.
There can be some catalyst that kicks off the reaction and that’s the only part you can really see and focus on. It’s a trap to try and tell people to replicate the catalyst without thinking about your soup.
I think this is true because I have had experience trying to do all manner of self help tricks. They almost never work reliably. Its some specific incantation that worked for the author. I don’t think anybody else’s recipes will work for you.
Their recipes might give you great ideas for yourself. They might be almost the perfect fit. But I think it’s critical that you own the recipe. Make your tweaks. That’s what will really help you.
The other reason I believe in this is that I’ve had experiences where one day, I just wake up and realize - “hey i haven’t thought about that anxiety in a while?” and then you realize its been a long time and its just lost its power.
You don’t always need the catalyst. The soup can do the work all on its own.